it's been a long time since i've written on this blog. i actually wanted to start a new blog entirely, because i didn't feel comfortable with this one anymore and wanted to start off fresh, but then as i was rereading some old entries, i saw the beauty of the timeline of my emotions over the years that i couldn't help but want to continue with this one again. i've had a lot of change and growth since my last entry here. there are also a lot of things that i've accomplished that i am proud of.
since my last blog entry in April 2013, i've graduated from USC with my Masters of Social Work. I moved back to my parent's house and had a going away party with friends. I got a full time job less than a month after graduation and moved back to OC. I interviewed at a hospice, got offered, and accepted the job on the same day, on June 5, 2013. My official DOH was June 13, 2013, a day after my dad's birthday. I moved back to live at my relative's house in Westminster and paid rent until i found a place to rent with strangers on craigslist. I started dating Randy again, which i didn't expect. I moved to Anaheim on October 1, 2013. I got in a major car accident on October 6, coming back from SM to Anaheim, which totaled my 2006 Honda Civic. It was the scariest thing that has ever happened to me. A car was merging into me and i swerved to avoid it but lost control and crashed into the center divider and then my car spun out across all four lanes on the fwy over to the side and crashed into the rail there. i still get afraid to drive on the fwy now, but i have to drive so much for work that i need to just get over that fear. I got a new car, 2014 Honda Accord Sport, from my parents to replace my old car. I love it and I love my parents for always being there for me. They really do take care of me well. I became more financially independent by paying my own rent, health insurance, dental insurance, student loans and other bills. i'm especially proud of being able to pay off my student loans on my own. My goal is to pay it all off in less than 2 years from now, so about December 2015. I got a second job that is on-cal at my previous hospice internship and started on November 6, 2013. I was pretty proud about that too. I'm still getting trained to do new tasks for the job, but i'm enjoying it a lot even though i may complain a lot. Just surrounding myself with professional and experienced coworkers has given me a lot of the growth that i've needed for myself professionally. i've been learning how to compromise more in my relationship. Overall, i've just been trying to understand life as an adult since graduation. i'm slowly getting there. I've been having a lot of different desires and wants for some time and it's a struggle for me to understand if they're valid, selfish, or unreasonable. or if it's just a phase. i guess only time will tell.
Goals for 2014:
-be more assertive
-put myself first
-do not feel bad about doing things i don't want to do
-be more confident in my skills, qualities, and assets
-be more refined
-redevelop my style
-start sewing again
-gym at least 4x/wk
-give more of my time to others
-be more open to others
-develop closer bonds and relationships
-travel
-take care of my skin and body
-learn to juice
-deepen my yoga practice
-not compare myself to others
-have deeper self-awareness
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